Sasquatch: Dad, can I have $20?
Dad: I gave you money this morning.
Squatch: Dad, that was yesterday.
Dad: Oh. Yeah. Wow. Summer, right?
Squatch: It's cool. You've been working a lot.
Dad: Yeah, thanks. . .wait a minute.
Squatch: Working on . . . on getting old.
Dad: Gimme a second (dials mom).
[My Attorney] What?
Squatch: EVERYTHING HE SAYS IS A LIE!
Dad: never mind (click).
Squatch: Ten bucks for trying?
Dad: Seriously?
Squatch: Five for bravery?
Dad: You've got balls, kid (hands him a fiver).
Squatch opens his wallet to put in the five bucks–it's full of money.
Dad: What the hell?!
Squatch: What?
Dad: How much money is that?
Squatch: A buck twenty.
Dad: WHY ARE YOU HITTING ME UP FOR CASH?
Squatch: I need it for lunch!
Dad: [cursing]
Squatch: Dad, I'm not spending MY money on food.
Dad: [cursing]
Squatch: I mean, you guys are my providers, right?
Dad: What the hell am I going to eat?
Squatch: (pulls a 20 out of his billfold) Here, buy yourself something nice.
Dad: [explodes]
I found a way to get even. When I opened their bank accounts I got access and a debit card. Whenever I get "short" of money, I raid their filthy lucre. BAM !!
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