13 New Countries Just Added to Epcot

1. Tursjikstan (fun to spell.)


2. Lithuania (actual size.)


3. Darfur (every 20 minutes a mechanical Bono sings "We Are The World".)


4. California (Move the Terminator ride here)


5. Cuba (So we can all smoke good cigars. Accessible only by raft.)


6. Russia (just a bunch of mean looking dudes in leather coats staring at you out the passenger window of a black Hummer.)


7. Wales (Teaching the English how to be English since 1103.)


8. St. Kitts & Nevis (because it would confuse the hell out of England.)


9. Cote d'lvoire (You need to have at least one Gay country.)


10. New Orleans (they have the best water ride.)


11. Djibouti (their dance club motto: Shake Your Booty in Djibouti!)


12. Belarus (Cause where else will the aliens go to land?)


13. Ireland (Like on Mission to Mars, you pick the green side or the orange side and one of them makes you throw up).